We usually solidify our identity by grasping on to the people, places, and things around us and our experiences and emotions in the past that continue to be a part of us. We consciously and unconsciously find comfort in same routines and same cycles. Because our brains get used to firing in habitual patterns, they resist change. That is why change can be scary.
Our minds and bodies resist the unknown simply because it lacks a clear picture of people, places, and things and holds a level of uncertainty and change.
This is part of the reason why it is easier not to change-because we are afraid.
Along with this fear of change, often comes head talk:
"Can things really get better? Things are pretty good now and I'm comfortable...What if things get worse and I regret the change?"
We are meant to grow, learn, change, and move. That is God's plan for us. The only way for us to reach our potential is to do all of these things. The scriptures are full of inspiring verses to help us on our journey to getting better.
After my husband served in the Air Force for four years, we made the tough decision to separate from the military. Even though we felt like it was the right decision, we had many moments where we looked back and wondered if we had made the right decision. After five years of occasionally thinking in this manner and almost rejoining a couple of times, a thought occurred to me, and I asked my husband, "Do you believe that God can show you something better than the Air Force?"
He realized that the answer to that question was No. We know that we can change our perceptions and beliefs, so we both forgave ourselves for believing and thinking in this manner, and made a conscious change in thinking and feeling that YES, God could show us something better, and we would let him do that.
It was at this moment that we finally closed the door to the Air Force and decided to relocate our family so my husband could finish his college degree.
It was a hard decision to move our family because our children (ages 10, 7, and 3) were happy and settled in our community, church, and schools. The move brought a lot of doubts, fears, and looking back at times.
However, after being settled in our new surrounding for a while, we were able to look back and see the ways that we had all grown and the wonderful friends our children had made. We all agreed that many things had gotten better than where we were before, even though we didn't think things could get much better before the change.
Two years later, our family is on the brink of another move, so my husband can start a new career in a new place. Once again, it is unknown and scary. My kids are worried about leaving their new best friends and going to a new place. I asked my son one day,
"Do you believe that when we move, Heavenly Father can lead you to even better friends than you have now?"
His answer made me sad, because he said, "No." But it just made me realize that we had some work to do on our level of faith.
We believe in Jesus Christ, but do we really believe Him and His promises? In the inevitable flow of change in mortality, things can get worse, or with faith in Jesus Christ, things can get better.
Our circumstances can get better.
Our Hearts can get better.
Our health can get better.
Our careers can get better.
Our marriages can get better.
Our finances can get better.
We can't physically see what is ahead, but we can feel it; we can imagine it, and we can trust it.
Yes, better is possible.
I'm Alicia Banta
Lover of life.